


A Sunrise That Will Never Come

by charmedward



Series: Critical Role Rarepair Week 2016 [2]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: F/F, Friends to Lovers, Misunderstandings, spoilers for episode 59, syngorn, the feywild, the twins have a terrible father, trees as wingmen, ultimate gal pals, vax gets wasted
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-11
Updated: 2016-07-11
Packaged: 2018-07-22 23:35:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,005
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7458078
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/charmedward/pseuds/charmedward
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Vex just laughs, her heart thundering in her ears. She is invincible, immortal. Death does not come for her, but waits patiently for when she is ready to embrace it. She feels powerful, untouchable. She feels….<br/>Keyleth’s arms. </p><p> </p><p>Spoilers for Episode 59.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Sunrise That Will Never Come

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Critical Role rarepair week! Day 2: F/F pairing
> 
> Thought I wasn't going to finish this in time but I did! Here's one of my favourite pairings in this fandom: Vex and Keyleth. I'm so glad that I got a chance to write a little about Syngorn too, as I love how this is leading us into a much anticipated Vex arc! 
> 
> Thanks once again to Aloysius for her help with this <3

When Vox Machina arrived at the elven city of Syngorn, they had not expected a warm welcome, nor to be met by Syldor Vessar. Which was good, because they received neither. Instead a small unit of guards escorted the party (and one invisible satyr) through side streets and away from the main thoroughfare, until they arrived at a property that was half built into the body of a large tree. 

A guard disappeared inside and reappeared moments later with an elf who was short by elven standards and who wore robes that Vex noted as her father’s colours. She didn’t recognise the individual, but he introduced himself as Varamir, their host for the duration of their stay in Syngorn. Varamir explained that Syldor was locked away in meetings for the day, but would be made aware of his children’s visit and will meet the party tomorrow. 

Vax had told the party that ‘meetings’ meant that their father was taking the night to decide how to deal with his children’s sudden appearance. Varamir’s mouth had downturned at that. He then had their guards escort Vox Machina to a private dwelling usually given to foreign guests of note – royalty and the like. This time Vex translates the meaning to the party, explaining that rather than being honoured, they were being hidden. Again, Varamir’s expression soured. 

The property they are given is remarkable in that it is entirely built within a living tree. The trunk must extend for at least a hundred feet into the air and an indeterminable distance outwards with its branches. Delicate patterns are engraved into the bark around the doors and windows – which all look as though the tree has grown around them. Elves have a talent for nature based magic and Vex might have admired it if she didn’t dislike them all so much.

After spending a day on lockdown with Varamir, he finally leaves, reminding them all that guests though they may be, no one is permitted to leave the grounds of the great tree. Vax disappears at some point after dinner. Vex thinks that he only stayed as long as he did in order to support her. She tries not to dwell on it, tries not to feel like a prisoner in a city that has always been a jail. The others must feel a similar itch for freedom as less than an hour after Varamir’s leave the rest of the party sneak off in the hopes of finding a tavern. 

Vex stays behind. While the idea of disobeying Varamir – and therefore her father – is tempting, drinking herself into oblivion doesn’t sound like a good idea. She needs to be clear headed for tomorrow’s reunion.

Instead, she hops on her broom and flies up until she finds a wide branch that gives her fantastic views of the city. Making herself comfortable up amongst the leaves, she holds onto her locket and talks to Trinket, comforted with the knowledge that he can see out and that they are sharing this experience. The rolling city below is a delicate landscape of winding ivy, alabaster buildings and slender trees. She points out places of interest in the city below, recounts stories of her youth and tries to occupy her mind with reminiscing as best she can. 

At some point she addresses a songbird sitting on a nearby branch.

“Syngorn’s birds don’t look like that, Keyleth.”

The bird in question tweets and then suddenly Keyleth is shifting back into her half-elven form. She steadies herself on the branch and says, “Hey. I wasn’t spying, just so you know. Just thought you could use some company.” 

Vex snorts and looks back at the city. “It’s all right, dear. I was half talking to you anyway.”

A faint blush that clashes with Keyleth’s hair works its way onto the apples of her cheeks. She scoots over and makes herself comfortable next to Vex. Their legs – dangling over the branch - could touch if one of them moved ever so slightly. 

They sit in companionable silence for a moment, taking in the view.

“What’s he going to be like?” Keyleth asks.

“You’ve met him,” Vex says. “He’s a complete asshole. I almost thought he’d send us away at the door… Or have our ‘host’ do it for him.” 

Keyleth reaches out and places her hand over Vex’s; a simple, calming touch that does wonders to Vex’s temper. The fingertips resting above hers are softer than Vex’s own, untouched by the callouses of a bow, or the grittier sides of the world. This doesn’t surprise Vex. There’s something about Keyleth that has always looked soft. 

Clearing her throat, Vex tries to push those thoughts aside. “Why didn’t you go into the city with the others? I thought the tavern was your favourite place to be?”

Laughing, Keyleth knocks her shoulder into Vex’s. “Well it’s not as much fun without my favourite person,” there’s a pause. “Don’t tell Percy I said that.”

Stunned, Vex replies a little too late, her smile coming off forced and her “Of course” a little hoarse. 

More time passes until Vex realises that they’re waiting for a sunrise that will never come. The permanent dusk of the Feywild is deceptive like that. Though the sky may be streaked with the comforting colours of an ending day, it will stay like that forever more. As unnatural as it feels, Vex also takes some comfort in this one reliable fact. 

“Are you ready to head back?” Keyleth asks.

Vex nods and gets to her feet, the branch easily wide enough to accommodate her. “Don’t burn another spell to get down,” she says. “You may need it later.”

Keyleth’s brow knits together in confusion, then clears when she sees Vex take up her broom. Swinging herself onto the newly crafted seat, Vex looks down at Keyleth with a twinkle in her eye. She offers her hand.

“Just pretend you’re holding onto my brother.” Vex says, trying to keep her voice playful.

Keyleth coughs out an awkward laugh. “I’d rather not.” 

She takes Vex’s hand and hoists herself up onto the broom, wrapping her arms tights around Vex’s waist. For someone who flies as much as Keyleth does, Vex finds it hard to imagine that Keyleth is scared of what comes next. She reaches her left hand down to her waist and holds Keyleth’s arms in place, just in case. In a largely ignored corner of her mind, she acknowledges the fact that this memory will be played on a loop in her mind for weeks to come.

“Hold tight!” Vex cries, before throwing them off the branch.

Keyleth whoops and yells behind her as they plummet in a controlled drive. The ground is rushing up to welcome them and with their speed it forces Vex’s hair back and out of her face, giving her an unobstructed view of their impending fate.

At the last second she pulls up and levels out, gliding at no more than a few feet about the grass. Her boots bend tall stalks of grass as they skim over the ground, both giddy and laughing.

“Remind me to never do that again!” Keyleth calls from over Vex’s shoulder.

Vex just laughs, her heart thundering in her ears. She is invincible, immortal. Death does not come for her, but waits patiently for when she is ready to embrace it. She feels powerful, untouchable. She feels….

Keyleth’s arms. Loosening their grip and shifting so as to rest on her hips. 

Vex stops the broom.

“Well. I hope you enjoyed that. Most people only get to hang off the broom.” Vex says, her tone clear that the ride is over.

There’s a second before Keyleth infers Vex’s meaning, but then she dismounts and takes a step towards their temporary residence. 

“Are you coming inside?”

“In a minute.” 

Vex waits until Keyleth has gone inside before she too dismounts the broom and pops out Trinket. The brown bear emerges with a cry of joy and shoves his head fondly into Vex’s midsection. She chuckles and scratches him behind the ears. 

“Hey buddy,” glancing over her shoulder to be sure no one is around; Vex lowers her head and confides in her bear. “It’s all a mess, Trinket. This was a mistake.” 

The words fall heavily and Vex feels her heart sink, even as Trinket looks up to her with his chestnut eyes. She considers casting Speak with Animals, but then Trinket nuzzles into the palm of her hand and she knows what he’s telling her. The love that shines out of his eyes is like nothing Vex has seen before. He looks at her and Vex knows in her heart of hearts that he supports her, that he thinks she can do anything. The thought brings tears to her eyes.

…

At a time that would – if they were on the Material Plane – be the early hours of the morning, Vax and the rest of Vox Machina make their drunken return, a certain inebriated satyr also in tow. From somewhere down on Vex’s bedroom floor, Trinket sleeps soundly through all the ruckus. Vex, however, hears giggles and stage whispers as the others try and find their way to their own rooms, with little success. They grow progressively louder until she rolls away from the commotion and pulls her pillow over her head. It helps a little, though not enough to drown out the dull _THUD_ as something large topples over. Scanlan’s loud peals of laughter ring out through the rooms, matched by a bark that Percy calls a laugh. They appear to shush themselves and their voices get farther away as they retreat into their rooms.

 _Thank Sarenrae,_ Vex thinks.

Her door opens.

Faster than one of Percy’s musket balls, Vex is rolling over and reaching for her bow. Reason comes to her a second later as she spots her brother’s form backlit by the braziers hanging in the hallway. Vax comes to a standstill and squints at Vex’s bed. 

“S’not my room. Not my room at all,” he says, speech heavily slurred. 

He turns to go back and presumably find his room when Vex calls out “Brother!” and halts him again.

“Vex…ahlia,” he calls, arms coming up and nearly throwing him off balance, “my darling sister.”

Vex sits up in bed. Vax has never been this drunk in front of her, not even during the wake they had for their mother. Seeing her brother in this state makes her want to fly to their father’s home and kick down every door between them, until she’s able to tell him face-to-face exactly what she thinks of his parenting.

“Vax, stay with me tonight,” she says instead.

She tries not to feel guilty about the note of pleading that she adds to her tone. There’s no way she wants to be apart from her brother when he’s in such bad shape. It’s clear to her that now, more than ever, they need each other.

Vax, drunk or not, finds it hard to deny his sister anything. He stumbles into bed beside her like they did the first few nights after they moved to Syngorn. Vex fetches her brother a bowl in case he gets sick during the night and she turns him so that he’s in no danger of choking should he not wake up. When they’re finally settled Vax tries to put his cold feet on Vex’s and she kicks him hard.

“Owwwww. M’telling,” he threatens.

Looking up at the dark ceiling, Vex doesn’t answer him. Through the thick blinds at the windows of her room she can almost see the dim light of dusk trying to enter. It’s not enough to keep her awake, but the gnawing feeling in the pit of her stomach might be. Tomorrow will be critical to their journey here in the Feywild; worst still, it’ll necessitate an encounter with their father. Yet above those issues is another. One Vex can no longer deny. 

“I haven’t been honest with you, brother,” Vex says.

There’s no reply from Vax, so Vex continues her confession in the dark. “It isn’t that I’ve lied to you, but… I’ve withheld something. Something I wish I could just tell you and have done with, but it isn’t that simple.”

She pauses to gather her thoughts. Every word feels like a footstep over an invisible line. How far is she willing to go?

“I want to talk to you about Keyleth.” 

There’s a rustle of sheets as Vax shifts his weight beside her.

“Keyleth’s great,” he mumbles.

“Yes, I know. That’s the problem,” Vex replies softly.

Vax waves one limp hand in protest. “S’not a problem. M’not gonna court her.”

The statement brings Vex to a halt. She knows of course about the falling out that Keyleth and Vax had inside in the temple of the Raven Queen just a few days ago. Pike had given her the details. She’d thought the difference in religious ideology would be a problem for the two would-be lovers, but not to the point where it would actually prevent them being together.

“Really?” she asks. “You’re not going to try to win her back?”

There’s a grunt from Vax that Vex takes to be a “no”. She had hoped- Vex stops herself. 

“Be that as it may, you deserve to know,” Vex continues. “I know you’ve had your eye on her for a while and- the thing is, I understand. Why you love her. I see the light in her soul and the fire in her spirit. The way she fights for us, all of us. Vax, brother, I’m- I’m in love with Keyleth.”

No reaction.

Vex flips onto her side so that she can stare at her brother’s back. His breathing is steady. It gives her little insight.

“I wasn’t going to tell you. Not if you wanted to be with her… and she with you. I wouldn’t have done that to you both.” Vex pauses, “I didn’t mean for it to happen. You need to know that. I take so much from you-”

Her voice breaks. Tears are once again welling up but she forces herself to continue. Vax has to know this was an accident. A cruel trick of fate. She would never willingly hurt him.

“There’s nothing malicious about it, brother. I don’t see her as a toy for us to fight over. She- I can’t describe it.” 

Still Vax says nothing. His breathing becomes an anchor for Vex to focus on and try to copy, even as her voice continues to shake. 

“I love you. If you say this would hurt you – if this is too much – I won’t- I won’t go to her. I need to know that we’re okay. That you don’t hate me for this.”

Her heart is breaking. It’s like removing a bandage and finding an infection where there should be a freshly healed wound. She hadn’t thought that confessing to Vax would be as painful as it is. Hadn’t truly considered the idea that he might not forgive her.

_Why won’t he say something?_

Vision blurry with tears, Vex almost doesn’t see Vax’s hand reach back and find her own. He squeezes it once. Drops it.

“Love you, Stubby.” 

This time, Vex’s tears find their way onto Vax’s shoulder as she throws herself forward and pulls her brother into an uncomfortable hug. He pats her arm as she lets the tension drain away and slowly, finally, they fall asleep.

…

The next morning starts early for Vex. She wakes long before the rest of the party and spends an embarrassing amount of time fixing her hair and polishing her leather armour. This she does in the main living quarters of the guest house, as Vax is still snoring on her bed. She’s halfway through her work when Keyleth steps into the room.

“Good morning, Vex,” Keyleth says.

“Is it?” Vex’s reply comes out a little sharper than she’d intended.

Hesitating, Keyleth crosses to a sofa near Vex and perches on the arm it. The pose reminds Vex of the branches they sat in last night. For a moment the only sound is Vex scrubbing at her armour, the frustration she feels at being in this situation with her father coming out in force. 

“It’s done.”

Vex keeps scrubbing. “What?”

“Your armour, it’s done. You’ll scrub a hole through it if you keep going.”

Sure enough, the leather piece that usually sits snug against her ribs is now a shade darker and gleaming. Realising this, Vex sets it aside and throws her polishing rag onto a pristine table. Keyleth raises an eyebrow at this but wisely says nothing. She waits for Vex, who plays with the feathers behind her ear until she seems to burst.

“It’s going to be difficult for you, today,” she says finally.

Keyleth looks taken aback. “Difficult for _me_?”

“Elves, full blooded elves, don’t like half breeds like you or I. We’re tainted in their eyes. Embarrassing accidents. And you,” Vex waves her hand in Keyleth’s direction, “you’ll have it worse. These elves are all about tradition, appearances. They don’t approve of druidic tribes.”

It’s so easy to be angry on Keyleth’s behalf, to pool the anger she rarely lets out and to flood a room in someone else’s name.

Sliding down onto the main seat of the sofa, Keyleth tilts her head slightly. “Vex, these people don’t mean anything to me. Their opinion of me doesn’t matter.”  
There’s a sound from above and it seems as though the rest of the part is finally waking. Vex doesn’t know what she wants to say, where she wants this to end. She thinks, fleetingly, that she’d like to go back to bed and postpone this day for a few more hours.

Keyleth obviously hears the movement upstairs and she casts a look over her shoulder at the empty doorway. She picks at the skin around her fingernails like she does when she’s nervous. _Join the club,_ Vex thinks.

“Before the others come down, I need to talk to you.” Keyleth says.

Vex is only half listening now. She’s on her feet and pulling on her armoured bodice. The leather – moulded to her form after years of use – is the tight hug of a friend. 

“Go ahead, Keyleth.”

“I couldn’t commit to Vax because another held my heart.”

Vex freezes. Repeats the words in her head. The more she does, the more confused she gets. Vax and Keyleth went their separate ways because they were too different. There was no other reason… Right?

“It didn’t seem that way when you were kissing him. Or when you told me of your feelings for him.”

Vex’s words are gunshots, piercing through Keyleth’s defence. And like all gunshots, the recoil hits Vex took. Even as she speaks, she’s thinking: _Can it be true?_

“Vex, hear me out.” Keyleth pleads.

Already the druid’s eyes are glistening. Already she holds her hands clasped tightly to her chest. For once Keyleth isn’t fighting to win. 

“Keyleth, I don’t think today is-” Vex interrupts herself. “Today is going to be hard enough already. Please don’t… please don’t make it any harder.”

What business did Keyleth have sharing this secret with Vex? Did she think Vex would support her with this newfound love interest, whoever they were? 

“I know the timing is terrible, but you need to know. 

“I love Vax, but not how I thought I did. I love all of our party. Even Scanlan,” the joke doesn’t do anything to ease Vex’s pain. “Vax and I… we were reaching for comfort, wherever we could find it. These past few months have been horrible and sometimes… it’s the little things.”

“What’s little? Are you talking about me?” Scanlan says, entering the room.

Both women jump at Scanlan’s appearance. Scanlan, for his part, merely yawns and throws himself into the closest armchair. “Syngorn needs to invest in better cushions. I spent half the night being poked by feathers.”

Vex nods, eyes on Keyleth. She’s piecing together the information she has. Adds to that the blush on Keyleth’s porcelain skin and the way she won’t meet Vex’s gaze. 

Something clicks.

“Oh gods. _Keyleth_.”

The other woman winces and sinks even deeper into herself. Scanlan watches them both with mild interest.

“Darling, were you talking about me?” Vex asks.

“I need some air,” Keyleth mutters.

She’s on her feet and out the door before Vex can say anything else. A heavy silence follows.

“Did I interrupt something? I feel like I interrupted something,” Scanlan says.

Vex says something dismissive and gets up. She can’t feel her legs.

“Vex? You okay there?”

She leaves the room before anything else can happen. Pausing only long enough to grab her broom, Vex bursts out of the front door and tries to catch her breath. It’s her. Keyleth was talking about her. _Keyleth likes her too._

It’s too much to take in. The world spins and she has to reach out to support herself on the tree trunk. From somewhere far above, an acorn drops to the ground not ten feet from her. Vex looks up. A leafy canopy obscures her view and shelters anyone hiding in it. There’s only one person up there.

Vex gets on her broom.

There, up on the wide branch they had sat on just last night, Vex finds Keyleth. She’s standing with her back to Vex, flinging acorns one by one out into the surreal sky.  
Vex lands softly and props her broom against the trunk. 

“If Syngorn was weak to aerial attacks by acorn I would have levelled this city years ago,” she says.

To her credit, Keyleth doesn’t jump at Vex’s voice. Instead, she reigns herself in and drops her handful of acorns. They bounce off the branch and hurtle down to the grass below.

“Where did you even find acorns this time of year? It’s winter,” Vex continues with a poor attempt at humour. 

Keyleth turns around. “I’ve been carrying them for a while.”

Vex can’t help it. She closes the distance between them and draws Keyleth down for a hurried kiss. There’s no resistance on Keyleth’s behalf, only a surprised noise in the back of her throat before she’s kissing back. Slender fingers reach up to the sides of Vex’s face and they part with a sound that makes Vex to go back for more. She looks up at Keyleth through hooded eyes and sees the other woman once again unable to look at her. 

“I didn’t mean for it to get so messy, Vex. I didn’t even mean to tell you today-” 

Vex holds up a finger and hushes Keyleth. Try as she might, she can’t keep the fondness from her eyes at the sight of the druid working herself up. For all this time, Vex had thought she was alone in her emotions. She would have never thought Keyleth could hide something like this.

She had never thought she could actually _have_ something like this.

“It isn’t messy, Keyleth. You and my brother are a finished book, you’ve both said as much. He’s free to pursue whomever he wants…as are you.” She takes Keyleth’s hand and squeezes them. “As am I.”

A tentative smile blossoms on Keyleth’s pink lips. 

“Vex. Are you saying we can do this? That you return my feelings?”

Vex casts a look over at the forever dusk of the Feywild. Today will be a day of challenges, of unpleasant conversations and events, but when she looks back on this day all she will remember is how Keyleth glances at the sky too. Vex turns to her and cups her cheek. Her words are silk, her heart unguarded:

“I love you, and I will continue to love you until sunrise.” 

Keyleth’s forehead comes down to rest against Vex’s own and she laughs quietly, laughs the giddy laugh of a person whose life is forever changed. Before she leans back down to steal their second kiss she says one last thing:

“Until sunrise.”

**Author's Note:**

> Has anyone listened to the Hamilton song ‘Hurricane’? There’s a verse where Angelica sings “I love my sister more than anything in this life / I will choose her happiness over mine / every time.” Tell me that’s not Vax.
> 
> As always, you can find me at actualkatebishop.tumblr.com
> 
> Thanks for reading!


End file.
